When I was 16 years old I had to grow up quick. When most people were going to college and meeting new friends, I was moving out and buying baby clothes. When most people were practicing driving and having fun on the road I was cautious and extra nervous because I had a big baby bump. When most people were having a wild night turning 18 and having their first legal nights out, I was having a quiet family affair with my teeny 3 month old.
Being hit with a teenage pregnancy is something we don’t ever really think will happen to us; so when it does it can be a really crazy whirlwind. Ever since I can remember I’ve always loved babies and knew I always wanted 4 children after I’d finished college, was in my 20’s and had done is the right way.. I guess it didn’t really work out that way since I’ll soon be turning 21 and I already have two children!
Raising children when you’re really still a child yourself can be super tough. Even though I have been really lucky in that I have such a supportive family and partner the whole journey was still fraught with anxiety and complete and utter fear! Strangely I wasn’t actually all that worried about the actual birth, I wasn’t worried about having a set in stone birth plan and was pretty happy to just go with the flow no mater what happens. I knew to some extent that I would prefer to be as natural as possible and just take the pain as it comes. One thing that I really didn’t want to have was an epidural unless there was an emergency – I really hate needles!!
My main concern was the judgement that I would face. Whether on not it is intentional, there’s judgement from everybody! Looking back now it was really obvious that people didn’t expect me to be able to cope and that my relationship wouldn’t last at all. Almost four years later and we’ve had our ups and downs like any other couple but we’re still going strong and happy and fully settled into our family life. In all honesty I have doubted myself a lot, and have even questioned myself whether this whole grown up situation I dived head first into was going to work or crumble all around me and I had no idea if I was even going to cope at all.
Pregnancy to me was a really freaky thing. Actually growing a human being in my body actually made me feel sick and for me it honestly didn’t feel like an amazing and magical experience that most women feel. My huge bump was a massive reminder to everybody I saw of exactly what they didn’t want their own children to become. ‘Congratulations’ wasn’t really a word I heard that often and the only times I did came hand-in-hand with a certain facial expression. Even Max’s pregnancy was full of awkwardness and looks of ‘Really?? Another one already?!’
The harsh reality is that I had to grow up now.
No matter how grown up I already thought I was, there was a firm fact that I really wasn’t. When we moved out into our own house I didn’t even know how to turn on the oven! I actually had to phone Jack at work to get some very detailed instructions haha!
Actually raising Amelia was such a breeze! She was honestly the easiest baby and slept all night long fro the day she was born. Most days I could put her down on her playmat or in her swing and get everything done tht I needed to. Lucky right?! Well you’ll be glad to know that Max was the complete and utter polar opposite who barely slept and is still a bit challenging.
Being the oldest and having three younger brothers as well as a huge number of cousins and babies around me I was already pretty familiar with the ins and outs of babies and their needs. When I was 10 my youngest brother was born and at that age I was pretty baby obsessed so I thought it was brilliant that I could play with a real life baby and look after him whenever mum was doing the dishes, laundry or off checking on cows. I was always baby obsessed but it didn’t exactly make it any easier when it came to raising my own and finally calling the shots.
I knew I was young to start a family, I still am but it had definitely the right path for me. I would never recommend teenage pregnancy and I’m hoping that with my little corner of the blogosphere I will be able to help educate not only teenagers but also their parents too, and I would also love to be a shoulder to lean on for anybody that has either gone through a teenage pregnancy or anybody currently in that situation.
Thankyou for reading