The Mum I Am

I’ve been thinking a lot about the Mum I have always wanted to be – the perfectly groomed, easy going, always happy and positive, never yelling, wearing designer clothes. HA!

What a lovely dream that was whilst it lasted! The truth is parenting doesn’t really allow you much time to look after yourself whilst keeping two small being alive and I’m sure if I found some motivation and got up a few hours earlier I would be able to fulfil my dream of looking great 24/7.


The dream: Perfectly groomed (Hair & makeup I mean!)

The reality: I’m basically a bit of a hot and sweaty mess. It sucks but that’s just how my mornings go. It’s a waste of time me waking up early to do my hair and make up and wear nice clothes because by the time I’ve changed two lots of nappies, fed the toddler, stopped the baby from screaming bloody murder, cleaned up the toddler, changed two lots of nappies again, tried to dress the toddler, wrestled with the toddler, actually dressed the toddler, tried to dress the rolling baby, made bottles and packed the bags I’m quite literally a hot and sweaty mess with frizzy, fuzzy, uncontrollable hair. Q the Mum bun!

The dream: Easy Going

The reality: Sadly the daily struggles, frustrations and pleading battle just to get anything done has defeated my plan of being an easy going mum.

The dream: Totally With It

The reality: I’m the kinda mum that wonders around daydreaming of sleep and a magical land where princesses can sleep for a hundred years (yeah I wish too!) That people look at and wonder whether my lack of ‘being with it’ is from a history of drug abuse or zero sleep (definitely zero sleep – to be honest sometimes I do wonder whether drugs would make me feel more like a human – I’ve never tried anything stronger than paracetamol so I really wouldn’t know!)

The dream: Never yelling, always happy and positive

The reality: Repeating myself 100 times just to get someone dressed and constantly asking a cheeky toddler to sit on her bum when eating rather than spinning around, running around or hanging off the highchair or her little hair makes mummy pretty cross and it usually results in yelling before I’m actually listened too. Unfortunately this means this mummy isn’t always happy and positive.

It really is lovely to have all of these dreams and ideas but to the expectant mum reading this or the mum that is just about to completely lose her shit: don’t worry! We all go out looking a total mess – that’s how we know who our allies are when we’re wandering around forgetting which direction we’re supposed to be going in, barely managing to put one foot in front of the other or what shopping we’re supposed to be buying rather than grabbing whatever’s closest just to get out of the shop that little bit quicker.

I am the mum I am, and you are the mum you are, so..

Salute your fellow messy, disheveled mother and remember, there’s someone else that is always going to be looking a little bit worse that you so rock that mum bun and be proud that you’ve made it through yet another day!

Have your dreams become a reality? Or has the reality of motherhood completely taken over and smacked you, hard, in the face?


3 Little Buttons
Pink Pear Bear
Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday

You may also like


  1. Totally with you on this. I always start each day totally easy-going. Which lasts about 34 seconds and then I usually end up misplacing my shiz over the fact that The Boy has run dropped my engagement ring down the toilet and The Girl is demanding milk, but doesn’t like milk, because milk makes her sick. Apparently. Gah! Hurrah for the mum bun! Thanks for sharing with #DreamTeam x

  2. We always start with the best intentions. Some days my mummy is totally ‘together’ and even impresses herself other days she’s a hot mess! You just got to be the best you can x #DreamTeam #TwinklyTuesday

  3. I love the meme that you can get on signs too. its something along the lines of excuse the state of my house – my kids were busy making memories.
    It just proves that what is expected of the stepford wives is impossible. Be happy with the mum you are, mum bun and all! #dreamteam

  4. Couldn’t agree more. The reality couldn’t be further from the expectation. Thank god the messy bun is fashionable right now. Any day we will see models strutting the catwalk with milk stained clothes and mismatched shoes. I’m sure of it. I remember when my son was first born, the first time I managed to shower, do some laundry, straighten my hair and clean the kitchen, I felt as accomplished as someone that had just climbed Everest. #KCACOLS

  5. Aww love this! I think that as they get older – mine are teens – you definitely have more time to reflect and think about what you;re doing and how you are going to be – it is definitely harder when they were small – I remember feeling totally crazed most of the time but now there’s time – pros and cons to both stages though, obviously! #BigPinkLink

  6. You are me four years ago! (I can’t believe I’m typing that, 4!!) I thought it would never get better but now I am able to make myself look slightly acceptable, I can dress in nice clothes and about 60% of the time they will stay nice and I am only half as frazzled and shouty as I was. You’ll be here one day too, although I probably wouldn’t have believed anyone that said that to me at the time! Thanks for being an important part of the #bigpinklink

  7. I felt really pressured to be this perfect housewife, wife and mother when I had my daughter – I was never perfect before I had her! Soon as I let go of that expectation I became a better mother! For me it’s impossible to look great and have a tidy house and work and be a mom! Something’s got to give, lol it’s me and the house! #KCACOLS

  8. Haha, this is great! I realised about one week in that perhaps I wasn’t going to be the glamorous yummy mummy I’d aspired to be! It never really got any better, but at least I don’t leave the house with baby sick on my clothes anymore! #kcacols

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *